Monday, August 22, 2011

Tips For Operating As A Team In Your Christian Marriage

In a Christian Marriage, I never imagined that it would be possible to marry another person and not just quickly be a team. But this happened in my experience basically because I had been foolish enough to believe it might just very easily take place after we said "I do".
The Scriptures discuss the advantages to working inside a teamwork environment, but it will require steps on the part of both husband and wife to work as a married team.

The Advantages of Companionship (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 NLT)
9 Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. 10 If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. 11 Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? 12 A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer.

As a young husband, I'd been eager to meet the demands involving my wife and future children. I made the mistake of making an individual success strategy designed to eventually help the entire family unit, or so I believed.

Here's what I learned:

1. Without the engaged involvement of one's spouse, the very best course of action isn't going to be successful. I had been working for the achievement of my own desired goals each year, however she failed to look at them to be team successes. Major issue!

If you are not a team, harmful competition may form between you and become divisive. At some point, I awakened to a spouse that honestly believed she had little or perhaps less importance compared to me inside our relationship. "How so? I count on you for almost everything honey."

2. As being the head, it is your task to help affirm, help, as well as value the particular work of your spouse in every single given venture. In modern day world, front runners get lots of the public appreciation for any accomplishments actually acquired through the team. You can't adjust the way people could address your supporting cast, nevertheless you must find strategies to give them appropriate recognition for the effort which takes place behind the scene.

Whether you like football or not, we could all learn from quarterbacks that rapidly praise their offensive linemen whom guarded them all game long. They recognize that without their particular hard work, the astounding passes which the crowd adores would not have been possible.

3. Give your mate the chance to obtain some leadership experience when the circumstance occurs. There isn't any better option to completely understand precisely how essential the TEAM is than to become the leader by yourself.

I might function as the head of household at home, but Jesus provided my wife the chance to head a young adult group in our Church and I supported her decision to make it happen as part of my personal dedication to the team as well. A couple of months later, when the group had taken on a substantial fundraising task which could not be accomplished by simply my wife's efforts alone, it became obvious that amazing things could only happen if the team stepped up and helped her. She had absolutely no option, but to count on the group. This experience was good for our relationship since it has deepened her knowledge of being the leader. In exactly the same way, every single man needs his wife whether we verbally communicate it or not!

Challenge: Design a combined marriage success strategy along with your husband or wife! Post this within your house to be a continual reminder. Your likelihood of accomplishing everything that the Lord has for your Christian marriage are actually far greater if you agree on the plan.

On this Christian Marriage journey, we will have to learn to work as a team if we plan to reach our full potential and accomplish all that God would like to do in our lives.  We know God is there, but it helps to have the support of a few others as well. You no longer have to struggle alone in figuring out how God's Word applies to your Christian Marriage. On this blog, you will find Christian marriage advice, supporting Scriptural references, inspiration video clips, and many other resources to help improve your marriage one day at a time.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Christian Marriage: Managing That Dangerous Anger

Our current guidance for your Christian Marriage really is easy and worth a lot of sessions using the best marriage counselors. It is free of charge and has confirmed to be extremely effective if applied inside our marriages.

Ephesians 4:26-27 (New International Version 1984)
26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold.

Now this Scripture provides for us the Christian Marriage guidance essential to deal with conflict with your spouse as it arises.

Step #1: Do not make any specific hasty decisions or even react in emotion of the situation!
Even though most of us make this mistake every so often, we quite often regret it and thus end up needing to say sorry! It is essential that we relax to the point where we can think rationally.

Step #2: Discuss the problem that got you angry with your mate as soon as possible!
Even though it is advised that most of us take a few moments to be able to regain our own composure when necessary, typically the marriage problem will probably escalate internally if we never examine the problem at hand. God's anger management approach is to resolve our disputes on a daily basis. His way makes sense and we can focus our attention on ideally one problem at any given time. Despite the fact that His plan is quite simple to move on, we will need to follow it to have success.

Conflict resolution takes energy so if we're tired, it may be smart to agree to disagree, but make additional discussion a high priority for the next day.

Have you ever become irritated with your husband or wife, but not sure for what reason?

I would be inclined to bet the actual marriage problem was not addressed on that day. And as time goes by, most people usually forget about a few of the specific details, however the rage continues to be inside our hearts and minds and blocks people from building a healthy "closeness" with each other. It rapidly turns into a mess that is tough to figure out the basis of the problem anymore.
When we implement God's Word each day, we will steer clear of the explosions that will certainly occur in marriage whenever this unresolved anger builds inside of us.

This Christian marriage suggestions has to be applied individually in our marriages. We are not able to push our spouses to forgive us, yet we are able to show the way by example in the manner we deal with our anger with them. Remember that our relationships will  be enhanced or weakened by the way in which we deal with conflict.

It's unlikely that any of us will always be successful in meeting this Christian Marriage requirement, but it really should be a goal we strive to attain every day. It is among the key unique factors from a "worldly marriage".

Challenge: Physically post a note in your house to resolve your problems by night fall. See if your spouse would like to also turn it into a contract. Sign it and also hold YOURSELF accountable!

On this Christian Marriage journey, we will have to learn to control our anger or it will destroy us.   We know God is there, but it helps to have the support of a few others as well. You no longer have to struggle alone in figuring out how God's Word applies to your Christian Marriage. On this blog, you will find marriage advice and supporting Scriptural references and many other resources to help improve your marriage one day at a time.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Christian Marriage: Are You Praying Effectively?


We all absolutely need to pray for Christian marriage to thrive right now in a world which often attempts to split us in our major goals.

"And the two shall become one. So they are no longer two, but one" Mark 10:8
"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours." Mark 11:24


Even though Jesus professes this specific proclamation over the Christian marriage, the process of growing to be one tests most of our marriages. It may take us a little while before all of us come to feel as though we are one, but the Lord says our sacred joining makes us one. So through The Lord's eyes we're not individuals. When we pray for our husband or wife we need to pray as though we are praying for ourselves, due to the fact that we are.
It is necessary for people to know that prayer is just direct interaction with The Lord. Our choice of speech does not need to be amazing at all!


There are lots of resources for understanding the proper aspects of prayer should you be interested, however we have to all keep in mind that The Lord is our Heavenly Father and most importantly He desires to hear from His children. In your valley experiences, it might take everything just to gather enough energy to cry out even the least bit and the Lord fully understands!

The first task to praying with and for your spouse is always to know that God can answer your prayer.

In the course of a Christian marriage conference we were attending, there was a testimony portion in which a few married couples ended up being picked to speak about how Jesus has blessed their marriages. One of the testimonies stood out for me simply because my spouse and I had never heard anything like it.
The wife mentioned her husband had an addiction that she was unaware of for awhile. She had been a praying women and the more she prayed she sensed something was not right. She explained she usually felt like somebody else was in the bed with them. As if her husband had been thinking of a previous woman or something. She couldn't figure out what it was. Her husband eventually acknowledged his struggle with pornography. She was glad that he confided in her because now she could pray more precisely.
The woman prayed, " Father, you said that when my spouse and I got married we became one flesh. I know that where he is vulnerable I am supposed to be powerful. Half of my body is struggling with a porn habit. But the other half of my body does not have an addiction to porn. So I pray using the stronger half of my body and I command this harmful spirit to depart from my marriage in the name of Jesus."

We are all called to intercede with the exact same confidence and authority over the spirits that can come against all of our Christian marriages!

Challenge: Ask your husband or wife exactly what one problem, goal or area of their life you are able to pray for. Then spend time throughout the day making that one issue your own prayer focus for the entire day. You do not have to agree, respond or even have a conversation about it in any way. Simply make their important matter your top concern.

On this Christian Marriage journey, prayer is a tool we all need to utilize from day to day in our walk with God. We know God is there, but it helps to have a few others as well. You no longer have to struggle alone in figuring out how God's Word applies to your ChristianMarriage.  On this blog, you will find marriage advice and supporting Scriptural references and many other resources to help improve your marriage one day at a time.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Building Peace Through Priorities In Your Christian Marriage

All of us realize that situations occur from time to time, however this absolutely should not stop Christians from following God's priorities towards Christian Marriage on a regular basis. Perhaps you have taken no time in the presence of the Lord God prior to the daytime gets hectic and then reflect at night and ask Lord why we are now left with a sense of accomplishing next to nothing if anything after all?


Each of our marriages (and therefore the complete family unit) run reasonably as well as in order once we implement God's priorities.
1. Personal Relationship in God
2. Family (1.Spouse, 2. Kids, 3. Extended Family)
3. Job
4. Other Activities


If we do not establish these particular priorities in our Christian marriage, then the challenges of each day will have a way of driving all of us into becoming reactive to one predicament after another. As we all live by the Christian priorities, we can learn to analyze which new kinds of tasks should be included or old ones eliminated to better match each of our driving priorities.
I truly do wish to emphasize the order through which we ought to fulfill the demands of our family members. The marriage divorce rate could be lowered if we grasped the subsequent crucial precept. God made the Christian Marriage as the base upon which a happy as well as healthy family unit can prosper and be successful. The kids can never come first!
At some point I asked my wife, "Why do you insist on focusing on the family throughout a moment when we obviously should be discussing a more significant situation? She replied, "Because I just don't want to talk about our marriage right now".
How many times does this reply accurately point out every one of us? No matter whether you are honest enough to say it or not.


Moderation Is Key
If you've been around the Christian vocabulary long enough, you've probably heard the well known saying "Moderation in all things". As we all more intensely study the actual Bible, it is very important to remove up a widespread misconception. This exact saying does not exist in the Word of God. This commonly cited saying is obtained from Aristotle's Doctrine of the Mean.


The nearest you are going to get in scripture is what Paul writes to the church in Corinth:
1 Corinthians 9:25 (King James Version)
25And every man that striveth for the mastery is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a corruptible crown; but we an incorruptible.


In the work to work inside of the Christian marriage priorities, moderation will undoubtedly be expected. We are not able to devote all day absorbed in any one activity within a given priority. As Christians, we need to be watchful of our own engagement of Church activities to the extent that we start to neglect our family members. There are lots of good fellowship activities in many Christian churches, but these options ought to be separated in our prioritizing from the Worship services. It is The Lord's will that we look after the needs of the families that He has blessed us with too.


Challenge: Write down an average full week agenda for yourself. If the highest priorities are not reflected at this point, make the necessary corrections. Be deliberate, circle at least 1 week day and 1 weekend day that you will religiously follow this routine. Reflect on your feelings regarding your productiveness before bed.


On this Christian Marriage journey, we all have so many different walks of life.  You do not have to be alone!  We know God is there, but it helps to have a few others as well.  Check out Christian Marriage HQ where you will find much more marriage advice and supporting Scripture references to improve your marriage one day at a time.  

Monday, June 13, 2011

Christian Marriage: Building Blocks

Exactly what is a Christian Marriage?
"We are confessed Christians who have made a decision to go into married life." Is there significantly more to describe married life?

It is very important to learn to read God's Word that people can potentially better view the foundation of holy matrimony as He fashioned it. I am convinced that at least one explanation for why we are now hit a brick wall during marriage is simply because we do not possess The Lord's vision for it.

Let's take a look at Ephesians 2:21-32 in answering the basic question in this article.
Ephesians 5:21-32 (Today's New International Version)
Directions just for Christian Families
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, people have never hated their own bodies, but they feed and care for them, just as Christ does the church- 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery-but I am talking about Christ and the church.

This specific verse shows a straightforward commandment to the Christian Marriage:
• Wives: Submit to your own husband.
• Husbands: Love your wives in the same way Jesus loved the church.

I found it intriguing that God placed no conditions on this particular commandment for both . It is extremely important to remember that we will each be held accountable for our individual decisions. Not to defend the women at all, but unfortunately I think just one reason a number of ladies have an issue with submission is due to the truth that a lot of us men do not really love as Jesus. Not one of us have always been successful at meeting this Christian Marriage responsibility, however it needs to be an objective we attempt to achieve day after day. It is regarded as one of many main distinct elements versus a "worldly marriage".

Challenge: Verbally convey to your wife or husband that you would like to spend the following 1 week paying closer focus on living up to this God-given duty. Keep a record of key occasions for the purpose of conversation at the end of the week.
Now you know exactly where to start in building the fundamental blocks of your Christian Marriage! You no longer have to struggle alone in figuring out how God's Word applies to your Christian Marriage.